This is where you’ll find the text I’ve written to introduce my blog. It will be engaging and contextualise the breadth of content available on McCannecdotes. But a post below about a date gone wrong, or a nudey mishap might just catch your eye and you’ll never even read this.

A selection of the shit I've written thus far...

The Monastery & the Nude Beach

Ah, the nude beach story. A classic. In fact this is the only anecdote on this site that has been written about before, back on my old holiday blog from my trip around the former Yugoslavia in 2007...

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The Coming Out & The Punchbag

My first flatmates in London were a gay couple, I’d moved here to London with them. We’d all been friends working at the same company in Birmingham, and neither of them had come out yet...

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McCannswers – Reader Survey #1

McCannecdotes.com is now home to around 20,000 words of random mccanecdotal shit. This survey lets you have your say in the kind of shit I focus on for the next 20,000 words. Please give as much...

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The Ginger Man & The Strip Club

I had a long list of things to achieve before I was 30. The usual stuff, publish novel, win BAFTA, marry Ashley Judd. I compiled this list when I was 20, and ten years seemed like ample time to...

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The Online Dating Game, Part III

I got a bit McCannecdotal on this one girl last week who had e-mailed me from the dating website. It was entirely her fault, she asked me about 6 questions, and I had various stories related to each...

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Who Is This Man?

On a lazy Sunday morning when I can’t be arsed to leave the house, it seems the anecdotes come to me instead… My sleep was regularly interrupted by many buzzings at the front door this...

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The Hotel Sextape

Sorry to disappoint my female fanbase but I must point out that the sextape mentioned in my title does not involve me, at least not in front of the camera. This does however mean that the rest of...

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The Checkout Girl – Part I

In a previous post I introduced my “Polish Girls Are The Best” t-shirt and the kind of shenanigans it got me into, but that wasn’t what it was originally destined for. I had it...

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Times I Have Been Punched

Thankfully, this is not part one of a series, but still this post is longer than I’d like. Getting punched has always taken me by surprise. Whereas in a fight, I’d be ready and aware that...

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My True Colours

“Whit’s yer favourite colour wee man?” It’s a strange question to be asked in a dank seedy underpass. Maybe when I answered, the other young chap urinating against the wall...

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The Darts Conundrum

It seems even this website itself isn’t immune to random happenings. I decided to take a look at my site’s stats to see how many reads I was getting on recent posts. One of the stats...

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Things I Shouldn’t Have Said To Women

I’m well-known for my way with words with women, sadly not quite in the manner I’d hope for. If there’s something inappropriate to be said I have a habit of saying it and if...

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The Wrong Kind Of Gym Body

Do I go to the gym? Well, thanks for asking. People rarely ask me that, I don’t know why. Even the staff of Fitness First round the corner from work never ask me, as they patrol the streets...

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Online Dating Is For Freaks…

…Or rather, that’s who it’s supposed to be for. That’s who it was always meant to be for. Online dating was invented for those who struggled to meet people in real life...

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What The Fuck Is This Shit?

Hello, welcome to my blog. A few people have suggested I should write down the comedy happenings which seem to occur everyday in my life, and most likely, those few people will be the only people who...

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Rules For Complimenting A Lady

Women love compliments. FACT. Women hate compliments. Bizarrely, also FACT. The incompatibility of these two statements has vexed me since I first uttered the phrase “that’s a smashing...

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The Passion Of The Christs

“Excuse me,” she said, her angular, Billie-Piper-esque gob thoroughly filled with sandwich as she spoke, “Do you have a moment for a quick survey about religion?” “No...

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The Underground Pie Fight

I snapped tonight. No, I’ve not been doing yoga again, this was on the commute home. If you’re a regular reader you will know this has been coming for some time, my journey to the Tube an...

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The Bosnian Hoax

I was out in Soho celebrating a birthday party in our IT team. It was my second engagement of the night after a celebratory well-done-everyone project completion party, so I was nicely oiled by the...

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How I Lost My Vodka

There are a lot of stories on this site that involve drinking, but to be honest it came as a shock to me how many actually don’t. When I first started writing this blog, I assumed it would...

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Dissecting The Bird In The Salad

This didn’t happen to me, I read it in the news. Please calm your outrage, no I am not going to start simply reviewing common or garden news stories on this site (unless people really want me...

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My Bizarre Phobias

If you think you’ve got some weird phobias, have a read of this shit I have to put up with… Firstly a bit of context, I’ll get onto the bizarre stuff further down. I’m not...

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The Cash Machine Karma

I’m a big believer in Karma – the idea that your actions, good or bad, determine what’s coming to you. Of course, the fact that I am not a three-time multi-million-pound lottery...

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Who Wants To Date A Bosnian

My dating videos have generally been pretty successful, this is the story of one that bucked the trend, and made the girl in question … well, run away quickly. There are some similarities here...

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Recommended by Sima (my reader, I mean one of my many readers)