Health

The Underground Pie Fight

October 17, 2013

I snapped tonight. No, I’ve not been doing yoga again, this was on the commute home. If you’re a regular reader you will know this has been coming for some time, my journey to the Tube an ordeal because of inconsiderate brolly owners and religious zealots, and my journey on the Tube a constant source of fury because of selfish twat commuters. Well, tonight I fought …

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The Wrong Kind Of Gym Body

June 25, 2013

Do I go to the gym? Well, thanks for asking. People rarely ask me that, I don’t know why. Even the staff of Fitness First round the corner from work never ask me, as they patrol the streets giving away free passes and enticing the ladies, gentlemen, circus freaks, tourists and the infirm of the Soho area into their gym. Never once have they thought that …

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Operation Deepthroat

March 31, 2013
Let's face it, I hadn't had the anaesthetic, I hadn't cried when I got my injection, and I hadn't pissed myself. I'd already done pretty well with this girl today.

I’d been having some problems with the strength of my voice, it was croaky and would cut out sometimes. I’d tried all kinds of things to resolve it, but the only thing that seemed to do it was singing Belinda Carlisle on SingStar. I could sing karaoke just fine, but this was not a solution that would help me at work. “Hey Alan, how’s the …

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